The Wedding Cake in the Middle of the Road

A Friend of mine once was about to get married, the day of the wedding, things were not going smooth, She checked the time - it was almost 9:30AM and the wedding was supposed to start at 10:00AM and that is when the police arrived and told the groom that the car hit her future husband. Her mother looked at the pink two-candle cake. "What's a wedding without a cake?" she said to the guest. She put the cake in her right hand and went toward the window sill. She pulled up both her feet on the ledge. Looking down she said in a whisper "I now pronounce you husband and wife, the two shall become one." Cake in one hand and rice in the other, she threw the rice up in the air. As her sister Zintle watched the rice fly up the side of the building, her feet followed the motion of the rice . . .

The policeman checked his watch to write down the time and date. He put the time 10:00 o'clock next to the words "apparent suicide." He glanced over the police report to the post-it note with a list of items to bring home. "Milk, bread, juice ohh . . . " It was getting late. He sighed as he remembered the extra driving he had to do. The sound of far-off cries from this suicide's family brought him back. He hated cases like these and never could understand why. It was such a last resort for people. "Oh well, life goes on." The police man walked past a pink and white mess in the middle of the dirty blood-stained road. “What in the . . . “was all he could say.

Not all lies are harmful

Not all lies are harmful. In fact, sometimes lying is the best approach for protecting privacy and ourselves and others, some researchers say. Some deception, such as boasting and lies in the name of tact and politeness, can be classified as less than serious. But bald-faced lies (whether they involve leaving out the truth or putting in something false), are harmful, as they corrode trust and intimacy—the glue of society

We all lie, all the time. It causes problems, to say the least. So why do we do it?

It boils down to the shifting sands of the self and trying to look good both to ourselves and others, experts say. "It's tied in with self-esteem," "We find that as soon as people feel that their self-esteem is threatened, they immediately begin to lie at higher levels."

"We're trying not so much to impress other people but to maintain a view of ourselves that is consistent with the way they would like us to be, We want to be agreeable, to make the social situation smoother or easier, and to avoid insulting others through disagreement or discord.

It is a poor idea to lie to yourself

When I asked my friends why people lie to themselves, I got different answers, some of them don’t know, others think those who lie to themselves need a professional help but my own opinionated thought is that those who lie to themselves wants to feel good, actually to feel better, to paint this perfect picture which sends a message that’s favorable to them, to people around them. They live a falsified life. But where does it get them to?

Don’t think those people will really get somewhere with lies but they actually constructing a vicious descending sequence that makes it harder for themselves to achieve their set goals. For sure if you lie to yourself you’ll lie to others as well. Meaning you will live a false life. Lies lower one’s dignity. You will not get respect from others and definitely from yourself. Would you walk in the street with a connotation of lies within you, will you?

I believe a man/woman who lies to himself/herself has a problem. I mean, just think of the monomania one gets. Lying to yourself is one of the biggest problems people do and it prevents them from doing things they really want to do in life.

It is a poor idea to lie to oneself because you don’t take a path to righteousness, I mean in your career, your life and to other important things in life, so don’t lie to yourself, because its bad!

The sound of one hand clapping.

We use this idea a lot in teaching. For example, in third-level healing work where we assume that everything is a dream and everything is dreaming, we say that if you change one dream you automatically change all related dreams. So you can go to an imaginary garden and make changes to symbols of your life experience, and your life experience will change. In second-level healing work where we assume that everything is telepathically linked, we say that if you begin to silently bless and forgive people with whom you are having difficulties, they will know it and they will begin to change their behavior toward you without a word being spoken. And in first level healing, where we assume that everything is separate but potentially interactive, we teach that if you smile and hug a lot you will tend to get a lot more smiles and hugs back, even from people who don't normally smile or hug.

Now what do you think would happen if you applied this idea to the whole of your life? Surely things will work well for you until the end of your life! I am doing the same thing for my self so that I can live long and be happy for the rest of my life instead of having many enemies

Not all who wander are lost

Not all those who wander are lost. As human beings we all have dreams and want to achieve them. We thrive to elevate to our destinations. However it might happen that on your journey to your desired endeavors there will be ups and downs in a way that some of you find yourself being controlled by obstacles, wandering. They find themselves taking a different path from what they intended to, maybe because of these obstacles.

It might be that some of us are wandering because they want to; they treat life as it presents itself to them, while others are wandering because they simply don’t know what is right for them. They don’t know what to do. While some wander because they are timid to take responsibilities, they don’t want to be accountable.

Some wander because they have reached a deadlock, they perhaps have tried everything they dreamt to have but nothing worked. Not all who wanders are lost, some achieve their goals while wandering…they try anything that comes their way and make the best out of it.

I don’t think there is any individual with no purpose in life, there might be those who are lost or wandering but it might be a temporary thing. Everyone wants to get some where in life. That is why I say not all who wander are lost.

Namhla! The Go getter.

Namhla grew up in the Eastern Cape, raised by My Grandmother. I was an only child for most of my childhood, until three siblings of my mothers came along after my mother got married to my step father. As soon as my mother left me behind with my grandmother when I was seven years old, my biological father took me with him to Cape Town. I now have three little sisters and two brothers competing for my mom’s attention!

I moved to Cape Town to finish my school and my father wanted a better education for me. I  stayed in Khayelitsha for five years and then after that I moved to Gugulethu, until now that im staying on my own

Staying on my own is not as daunting as i expected, I  guess growing up as an only child helped me establish my independence from an early age. The biggest challenge was adjusting to having flat mates after years of never having to share my personal space.

I matriculated in 2006, at Gugulethu Comprehensive High where I was awarded the Golden Arrow Scholarship for one year at Varsity - for being helpful to other student by giving them counseling in time of need. The following year 2007 I was accepted at CPUT to study Public Relations Management.

I have suffered a few setbacks along the way, but I will be graduating this month of April 2011 for my National Diploma, and I am continuing with my post-graduate studies.

Otherwise i love giving as well as receiving, passion and uninhibited joy. Im total different from everyone, generous, kind loving person, most outgoing, disire to learn new things in life and my driving force is to take obstacles as challenges and find my way around them. I like interacting and co-operating with other people to achieve common goals.

How do you step from the top of a 100-foot pole

Stepping off the 100-foot pole can be as simple as paying attention, truly investigating reality.  It may mean really listening to ourselves and those around us. Sometimes this means inquiring deeply about our feelings and emotions.  Sometimes it means being open to a friend or teacher; being willing to be open to the perceptions and perspectives of our friends and teachers.

Destructive emotions can be summarized by five negative emotions: 

 Hatred

 Desire,

Confusion

 Pride

And jealousy. 

The more you examine, the deeper you look into the source of the human mind, the more these emotions appear, and the more they fade and disappear.  At the core of these destructive emotions is actually a core of clarity, and brilliance, something not in any way harmful.

 I step from the top of a 100-foot pole by being more open, accepting and loving of the other person. By more kind to other people , sharing and risk taking; I have the courage and skill to take these actions because through my meditation practice i have a taste of impermanence and a taste of emptiness, you come to know that everything is empty of being separate.

We are what we do

 People tend to eat a lot and forget about their health. We all know the saying: 'You are what you eat'. This also applies to how we think and concentrate and plays a role in how we deal with emotions. You eat a lot and you gain a lot of wait and become obesity. Yes, it's true; the food you eat has a dramatic effect on how your body functions.

 We believe that food is the center of our lifestyle and it makes up who we are from the inside out. What you eat impacts directly on your risk of disease, We simply aren’t getting enough,  People who are overweight increase their risk for high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, breathing problems, and other illnesses.

 To maintain a healthy body weight, people must balance the amount of calories in the foods and drinks they consume with the amount of calories the body uses. Physical activity is an important way to use food energy. Extreme thinness is also unhealthy. People who eat very little or diet excessively may not get the calories and other nutrients

Next time you're making a choice in the grocery store, consider what identity you're trying to reinforce. And if you want to make a positive change in your life, start looking at your consumer choices as small opportunities to reinforce the healthy, ideal you. Soon it will feel like the "real you."

We are afraid of the wrong things

We all afraid of the wrong things and I am sure most people do. I am afraid of the dark, I have always been afraid of the dark, I’m absolutely terrified of the dark, ever since i was younger till now. I remember I used to sleep with my sheet covering my face with this small hole for me to breathe, It’s totally irrational, and I’ll just flip out if I’m by myself in the dark for even a couple of  moments. I don’t feel bothered by it as in I see no need to have a psychologist or whatever ,it’s not as if it hinders me except for an occasional loss of sleep, but there’s always tea in the morning to make up for that. It’s kind of bred into people, I think, since there really used to be reasons to be afraid of the night some people can ‘rationally’ overcome it, but for those of us who don’t… well, it’s just a question of degree. But yeah, you’re not alone! I wouldn’t worry about it. I can’t even sleep at night with the light switched off.

I think fear of the dark makes sense evolutionarily – the dark is the unknown, and if you’re in a wild place outside in the dark, there could be predators, or who knows what else. So human survival would have been aided by an instinctual fear of dark spaces.

Just like with a lot of other psychological things, fear of the dark is only a problem if it interferes significantly with your daily life.

IM NOT THE ONLY DREAMER

A year and a half ago I was totally broke after a business failure. I was miserable had major problems with my mother, siblings and life was a total disgrace. One day I received an email from an Internet friend he opened my eyes and introduced me to this program called Gumtree to look for a job and I did, as soon as I was emailing my Cv’s to every post I saw on the internet that is in need of unemployed people, I started day dreaming and night dreaming about me getting a good job that will pay me a lot of money so that I can provide for my family and start looking after my poor family. And guess what happened the following year which was year  2010 I received a call telling to come for an interview, I went for that interview and later on received another call telling I’ve got the job, the excitement that i had was behind my control, I  laughed, I cried I even thanked God for getting this job. And I said to my self IM NOT THE ONLY DREAMER . you dream about something and it will happen exactly  the way you dreamed about it.

Fish falling from the sky

 I describe this say as “Luck”, its where by nice things are happening to a person beyond that person's control. It is also defined as Success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one’s own actions. This view incorporates phenomena that are chance happenings, a person's place of birth for example, but where there is no uncertainty involved, or where the uncertainty is irrelevant. Within this framework one can differentiate between three different types of luck:

Constitutional luck, that is, luck with factors that cannot be changed. Place of birth and genetic constitution are typical examples. Circumstantial luck with factors that are haphazardly brought on. Accidents and epidemics are typical examples.  Ignorance luck, that is, luck with factors one does not know about. Examples can be identified only in hindsight.

Many countries have a national lottery. Individual views of the chance of winning, and what it might mean to win, are largely expressed by statements about luck. For example, the winner was "just lucky" meaning they contributed no skill or effort.  So all in all The existence of luck and of the ability to influence luck, both for good or ill, is one of the prolific and diverse beliefs in all of humanity.

What is the colour of the wind

 I remember when i was young at school our teacher used to ask us the colour of the wind, Some said, wind doesn't have a color. And others used to say “Wind has a colour” which is colourless and the teacher would laugh at us and say, we just said it our self that the wind is colourless which means it has no colour so why do we say the is a colour then and we used to be confused by that, and then as i grow older and older I realise that my teacher was right.

I even asked my older brother when I got home after school and he said “the wind doesn't have a colour, because the light molecules travel through it.

And I couldn’t believe it when my brother said and i ended up confirming to mother and she elaborate more on what my brother said, she started telling me by saying to me, Wind is the movement of air molecules. Can air molecules have color? If they have color can they have more than one color? Air molecules are colorless. However, air often has other molecules mixed in it (e.g. smoke). These other molecules often have 'color'. Thus, they impart a color to the mixture of air and smoke. If this mixture is 'blowing in the wind', then the air may be perceived to have color.

If I were the boss

Its a difficult one and depends on the situation and job profile. Freshers are good in the sense that they are enthusiastic, hard working, fresh, always trying to do more, give their best. They are fast and lively, always on move. On the other hand, experience matters a lot as well. Specially if its a creative field. I feel, outdoor orienting job like marketing and sales are better handled by freshers while the designs and master minds have to be the experienced guys.

If i were the boss i would be willing to take up any risk to see that my company grows whether it be fresh candidates who cannot start delivering then and there ...;) but seriously i would like to have some aspiring freshers as well as some experienced hands on deck.. some fresh blood always simulate you to good ideas and changes... it is the duty of experienced hands to see to it that the fresh blood doesn't spill off the top... I wouldn’t mind singing and playing a song over a guitar listing what I would’ve done if I were a BOSS!

Lovely Mother city

A friend’s party and family do has driven me to return to Eastern Cape  and despite my worries, things are touchwood okay. In fact, I have a strange yearning to be back in Qumbu, something I never thought would happen! The silence however is slightly uncomfortable because in halls there is always something going on! The differences are amazing: the freedom to do whatever whenever, but against not having to lock a door whenever you leave a room; not having to wash up the second you’ve finished eating and more importantly toilet roll in the bathroom! Looking around my room it’s amazing the difference 5 weeks has had: I’ve spoken to perhaps 5 of the people in pictures on my walls and not really thought about them, and then there’s the list of things I need to take back to Mjikweni with a list of names and 5 weeks ago I’d never met these people, but now these are important people to me. I call these people friends. The place I live most of the time is Cape Town where I made lots of friends and here I am thinking I was even born here, the Mother city is blowing my mind away.

Two people come out of a building and into a story.

Last Sunday I was coming from the  church, while I was walking I decided to visit  my Friends place in Gugulethu, i took sum time there chit-chatting to my friend talking to her about the Bible and what has been said by the  Pastor, I left at my friends place around about 18:30 rushing  for my family thinking that they might get worried about me being gone for  the whole day,  when I got home only to find out that, no one even noticed that I was not even there or seen me living the house, I was shocked to hear that and thinking that I was not important to my family thinking all sorts of thoughts, not  being  loved while you think you specially in front or not of your family’s eyes, I asked my self if  that was really true?  to me. definitely, they were lying thinking I was going to mind or something but then I did do mind although I acted strong as if I didn’t care about them too. but all in all

I think the waters just got muddied a little further!

Perhaps I should take to calling everywhere home. I would be much simplier

If you feel comfortable everywhere you are then why not feel at home?

Design your short term Goal

Be Specific along with being realistic

it's also important that you be as clear and precise as possible when you think about your goals. What do you hope to accomplish during the first two weeks? In the first month? By the end of winter? But keep this in mind: Your ultimate goal may be to lose a certain number of pounds or inches, or to stop smoking altogether, but your more immediate goals should be to achieve consistency and to find ways to be healthier overall-whether we're talking about physical, emotional, or relational health. If you are consistent, your more visible goals will take care of themselves and you'll start seeing the evidence on an everyday basis. Then, once you start seeing improvement, it'll be easier to keep up the momentum. go for it, it worked so many times when ever i plan to design my short term goal and we all start at this stage and come next time you designing long term goals as if its easy.

Designer PR

Public relations is a foundation of an organization, a company without this foundation will collapse. Public relations practitioner can rebuild a company from being born again and get a good reputation or great uniqueness image of its original company, which will stop the customers from spreading bad publicity and start talking good because of Public Relation practitioner. Almost every company  that has PR department on its internal stakeholders is being touch by the PR practitioner turns into a success, if an organization needs to be on top of the sky, We all perform in some way every day. In what arenas do you want to perform better? To improve your performance abilities, you need to know, understand, recognize and be able to avoid the myths surrounding performance.

Public relations involve the cultivation of positive relations for organizations and products with its key publics through the use of a range of communications channels and tools. But today they are much more than that for intance Top performers are so fine-tuned in their disciplines that they have seen all the traps, pitfalls and blind alleys about performing, and have devised methods to overcome them to be able to sustain high levels of performance under all adverse conditions.

Meet myself and I